2AM thoughts

Is it necrophila If the body is still warm.
Never be forgotten. when leaving just say this. Well I'm off to analy fist a paraplegic miget.

Why do all fat people sleep nude!!!!!!

Why in gods name are thier fat people in nudist camps... Who wants to see a 400 pound man naked, cover in cisco trying to squeeze through a damn door.

Why do women try to hook up with married men. If you can get him away from his wife some other skank can do the same thing duhhhhh!!!!

If you cant see over the dash of a car. Maybe you should fix you fucking seat or by a car you fit in you sack of shit........
So this chicks giving me a rim job and blows air up my ass. Dumb bitch I had the shits and boom shit all over her face.....
Belly shirt is just a term not a request... If you hang out over your belt DONT WEAR A DAMN BELLY SHIRT!!!!!
If to gay guys are have sex and the one getting plowed fart is that considered a blow job. If its a wet one is considered lubing the chassis.

Written thoughts from high school

My Love, The message and falling, Written by Dave Tokar.
Title : My Love
To see her smile is like seeing the bright lights of heaven. Her eyes as bright as the northern star. She is an angel from heaven that has embrassed me. The gods hath named her crystal. My love for her is everlasting together forever we shall be.Title: The Message
I step backand laugh at you. While you sit there and stare at me. I know all about insanity and insanity is reality. Fuck it all... The worlds gone mad some are happy... The rest are sad... This worlds screwed up theres no way back. If you want to stay ahead you better not slack. If you do screw up. Your lost now and no one will ever find you. I'm not telling you lies. It's just the world through my eyes. listen to my message or you will die....

When morons go shopping

While shopping at Target I heard The most annoying sound. As I walked further it became louder. I saw two childern about 10 and 12 Years old beating on a keyboard. I had heard thier mother ask them to follow her. Yet here I did spy these two youths banging on the keyboard srill. I stared for a moment wondering where them mother was.... The youths looked up at me and said "what". I said "thats fucking annoying Stop Fucking around with that damn thing. The poor young woman straighten shelves said thankyou that they had been doing that for last 20 minutes. I tokd her no problem. The point nobody gets payed to watch your kids at a damn store. If you have childern that do not listen smack them up side the damn head or some stanger will.
Also while at target I was waiting patiently to be rung out. Some dumb shit father had two children. But were running around oblivous to the fact that his two kids were pulling things off the rack dumping windex on the floor and playing on the adjacent register. I look at My wife and exclaimed to my wife "what kind of fucking dipshit lets their kids run around like fucking idiots. The man then turn as though to say something. But then grabbed his kids finished his transaction. As he was leaving offered no apologies. Then as the store manager came over to clean the mess this ass hole gave him a dirty look for bieng upset at the mess caused by his two little kids. In closing if you can not raise your children to act right in public. You should be flogged until you can remember that your supposed to raise you children. Not to expect everyone else to do so.
While at cook out waiting for my food some dip shit was asking what size each burger was by weight. Hey dumbass Small, Regular, Large and Huge thats the fucking size. Pick one and eat it stop asking stupid questions. If your on a diet cool I have a tip to help you out... DON'T EAT FAST FOOD JACKASS!!!
While at work the other day a young man came in to return a video game the game pokemon DX. I inquired as to why he told my his mother was a advid christian and the the game was Evil. WTF Evil the just Pokemon. What evil in that damn game could really posses your child. what un godly act could a pokemon make a kid do.... Get a damn life and pull you head from your ass

IT IS TIME FOR SANITY

Okay I love video games anyone that knows me understands my sickness. I have to say I have become somewhat Bais on what it takes to be truely great gaming. I talk to people daily that have nothing more intelligent to say then "what system looks better". This must be directly related to the general american fasination with looks over substance. I will grant you that beautiful enviroments are helpful in video gaming emersion. But that only gets you so far before you realize that these amazing looks equate to a shorter length game with little overall difficulty that leaves you wondering if any thought was given to story. Most games that cater to the masses life First person shooters, sports titles and licensed games (ie. movie and tv based titles) Normally recycle sad story lines and repeadative game play. Those games are succesful because the players never question the norm, thinking if it looks better that if will be better. These games are released year after year with little gamplay improvements like better controls, more interesting stories or even longer game duration or replay value known to Role play gamers as new game plus. If you want to know if a game system is better the right question are as follows. What system has games that offer more replay value ? What system has games everone can play? What games on those systems have great story lines ? These are real questions to ask. I the passed 23 years I have watch video games go from something that has brought families and freinds together in the living room because they were almost totally intranced by the wonder of gaming and working to get to the next level and enjoy new experinces. Into a large group of have barely intelligent madden groupies and alienated parents without the slightest clue as to what gamers are doing. Rarely do I get to have conversation with someone that has anything better to say which system gots better graphics, I have to thank EA games for that ever year they do thier best not to raise the bar on sports games to far god forbide they try to really make better and more envolved. Why do that when you can see sweat on the forehead of a nfl player. How about collision detection that works or non retard AI. First person shooters have also screwed things up to the more gore and poor language the less an acutal family can share the gaming experience. I do enjoy the occassional Shooter for stress relief. But the market is littered with bad shooters that are progessively violent and valgure while pussing the multiplayer aspect instead of ingrossing story lines and overall game play length. Ever year madden players ask the same question whats new and does it look better. The last two years I have asked the same question only to receive the same answer. That question does it really matter and everyone always says no that thier still going to buy it. So just shut the fuck up and learn what it relly means to be a gamer adventure games, role playing games, cool party games, fun racing titles, truely interactive games that encourage a culture of gaming. Its more amazing to play games and find out how a friend finished a level that maybe you just could not figure out. Some games Have done this very well. DDR dance dance revolution, Super mario brothers, Final fantasy, Guitar hero, Shadow of colassus, ICO, and Resident Evil 4. These are great games that push all the greatest ideas in gaming story, replay value, diffculty, and allows for everyone one to enjoy gaming. SO whats the best system Nintendo WII it will bring everone back to living room with ease of use, fun gameplay and new controls to change the why you game. Now thats gaming... I have to the companies like red octane, harmonix, Square enix and Nintendo for not forgetting what is great about gaming.

Life sucks Vol 1

Well my wife and I are finally trying to have kids and here's the story so far. Crystal went to her specialist and everything checks out. Of course it was not all that quick. She had to go for blood work and hormone testing and vaginal exams so she by no means has had it easy. But so far I have had to submit to a fair number of pokes and prods my self. It started pretty simple jack off in to cup, which showed a azeo sperm count (no sperm at all). Well okay on to the urologist. What can I say its my own personal hell. I get a seemingly homosexual man I have to pay to examine me in a fashion that conjures up the dirty uncle scenario. Hi I'm doctor finger pull your pants down and let me see what's going on down here. He says well your nuts are a lot bigger then I thought they would be with an azeo sperm count. Then a little squeeze of the sack and on went the jelly to check my pulse on my balls!!!! God that was cold. Well so far so good. Doc says everything's looking okay. Well off to the next beat off in a cup parade. Here's a recipe for embarrassment office full of women and half a sleep me. They show me where the bathroom is so that I can collect the specimen, yeah weird hospital crapper. Upon Exiting the bathroom I ring a bell and the woman passing me yells order up(god I wanted to die). Then stand around like a fucking idiot until finally a woman tells me I'm free to go ( thank you, god I need a Smoke). Well on to the urologist two weeks later, And a whole new world of fun and entertainment . They say well another azeo sperm count and that they want to try something to see if there's a blockage. I figure okay I want to have a family lets do it off to the front desk and I receive my complimentary Tylenol and enema oh fuck what did I agree to. Well onto the next appointment, and more fun then you should ever have with a Doctor EVER.... They Bring Crystal and me in back. Once again a have to drop my pants only now I get to lay on my side and (wholly shit that's cold fucking A) now I get to here those amazing words I could live two more lifetimes without ever hearing again "I'm Going To Shove My Finger In This May Hurt Okay Now Alittle Further". I just wanted to die. My loving wife tried not to giggle. Then in went the probe my wife assures me it was a medical probe not just captain fruity' s magic wand. Well that's was refreshing nothing like paying a complete stranger to give the prison inmate treatment. I need a beer after that. On the plus side at no point did Mr.Tokar say hello at this appointment. Well now I set Forth for a biopsy on my balls to see if any sperm exist in my huge balls or if its just vacant property.

Life Sucks VOL 2

Okay so lets recap. My wife and I have been together for over a decade and the one thing I want to give her a child I haven't been able so far. Well this past year my wife and I went to a fertility specialist they ran some test and my wife checks out fine. Well then we get refereed to a urologist oh and the fun I have had so far. The urologist told me there are a few choices. So my wife and I decide to start a the top and work are way down and this point in the journey its all down. Well the doctor tells me that a prostate ultrasound is a fair bet to find the blockage. Lets stop and talk about the prostate ultrasound. This is a wonderful procedure where I got to hear such wonderful phrases like " I am going to stick my finger in rather deep and grease up the works. this might hurt a bit." NO SHIT ! I looked at my wife as she sees the look on my and tries no to laugh. Did you ever wonder where your prostate is I never wanted to know but I do NOW. Damn that hurt. While moving on we found out that there was no blockage and needed to then find out if I was making sperm. SO What is the doctor's next step nothing major a testicular biopsy. Wait. Testicular Biopsy. TESTICULAR FUCKING BIOPSY. But I am a man I love my wife so I say okay. I was told that there would be mild discomfort swelling and I might want to stay of my feet for a week or so okey dokey. Well in cause you no aware of what a Testicular Biopsy is let me provide you with some insight. The doctors knocked me out, Cut open my sack, pulled out one testicle and took a chunk out, put back the testical a little thread, and a little glue and on my way I stumbled. Remember the mild discomfort part well that was BULLSHIT. It hurts to walk, to sit , to shit, to stand, hell it hurts to fart and I fart alot. In other words it hurts alot. Imagine if you were a goalie with no pads, no cup and every shot hit you in the nads. Yep that is about as accurate as that gets. So here I am a week later and feel the mild discomfort I was told about. Yesterday I got the results and score one for the home team I do have sperm lots but they can't get out. Oh fuck me... So the doctor say they need to check for a blockage in the vasdifferens. So now he is going to open my sack again, pull out both testicles, inject some dye, hopefully find and remove the blockage. Damn Thats going to suck but I have gone this far whats a few more feet. Then hopefully its on to the baby making. Well wish my wife and I luck we'll need....With and luck my next entry will be The Blog formerly known as Life Sucks.

well fuck

Ok so here it is 1in the fucking morning and I Should really go to bed but instead I get all contemplative after a long ass ride from the middle of no where playing good guy picking my dads wife up from work. Well as anyone will tell you all you can do when your this tired on a dark night on the long road home is think smoke and listen to loud music to stay the fuck awake. Well me being who I am I get all retrospective and start thinking about the last 5 years. I now live in Alabama Americas butt crack. I have changed job 5 times. Left a great job with good pay for an ok job making a fair wage to a retarded job making insane money. Well fuck me I lose that job have a mental break down and move to you guessed it Americas Butt Crack oh what a life. Then I took a job so mind numbing retarded that an ape with a bag on its head could do loading and unloading premium hand crafted shit made in a 3rd world country. Now I have a job helping the worlds largest consumer base of complete dip shit whom could not work toilet paper with out instructions. Yet these fuck tards buy cell phones that damn near require A bachelors from Brown University to dial. Oh god I love these bunch of morons but hey with out these prom night left over’s I would not have a job and fuck this isn’t about them this is about me so fuck them. Ok so my loving wife. Whom by the way loves me for reasons I can not fathom. Has chosen to work at the same place and flow me on my trek through life. This woman has stayed with me for 14 years and for that deserves a God Damn Award. Quick someone send her money or one of those retarded bowling trophies. She has only wanted one thing in 14 years a baby and if we can keep this job long enough I might be able to give her very own 2 legged micro demon of my on coin purse. I am not looking forward to the surgery to make that happen but fuck you would have to be a completely mentally retarded asshole to turn her down considering another person would have hauled ass out of the train wreck I have the Honor of calling a life so far. I mean its not all shit but that’s kind of the smell at this point. I am a self professed Self center egotistical jackass but even I can see when a person really loves me and if a baby version of me is what she wants then damn it a mini me she shall damn well have.So to bring everyone up to speed on things I live in Alabama with my wife and Nephew ( Mike) our pets Baby doll, Noodle, kit kat, and Wittle Benson(and he is not that fucking little I assure you ) Mikes pets Little momma (yes she is small), Ichigo, Pumpkin, Raven and Speedy. For those of you that can not count that’s 9 fucking pets and 3 humans in a 2 bedroom 1 bathroom house. Yeah I fucking know that’s a lot of pets in 1 house shut the hell up we are happy and so are the pets so fuck off. Or I could let Benson eat you, You cocky dickhead. I work a fair job for a fair wage and that’s good for know. But I often think of the long road I have been on and how I got to where I am and no I and no asking for driving directions stupid. As the hands of time spin by It just does not feel like 31 years. I know that you get old and die eventually but shit I have not seen everything I want yet. I have a great wife and friend in my spouse. She has seen me at my best and worst yet there she stands arms wide and loving. My nephew has stood strong through the storms so far and looks good for a few more. But that’s just it I am tired of the shit I want some sunshine. I do not want a ton of cash. I do not want a dream life I just want the life my family deserves not me exactly I am a shit head but they deserve better and that’s what I live for the day my wife can say I can not wait for you to see my house and my Husbands restaurant . Or her animal shelter. I want a real fucking yard for my dogs not 300 acres but a yard where they can run. A place where my nephew can chill out and have friends over without having them drive from 200 miles or more to visit. No this is me crying my life sucks pity my , Fuck you save your pity for a sad fucker on the street I am not that guy. I work my ass off for everything.But here I am none the less bitching in a blog no one in there right mind will read unless my happy ass said hey read this shit I wrote. My hope in the near future that being in 1-3 years is to buy a house in a state I have never been to and find a way to keep my past from haunting me everyday like it routinely does now. where my wife is walking around going isn’t my son/daughter just adorable, where my dogs can play in peace and my nephew can walk or ride a bike or bus to visit friends. So fuck I guess I can still dream of a brighter future I guess I am not as negative as I think but my family deserves it they are the ones holding on for dear life to the shit storm I call a life and its them I fight for not me if I can make it happen then I can relax and consider my life a victory no fast cars no whores just a normal life where once in a while things do not seem shitty and they can relax knowing I have set my roots firmly and that tomorrow the shit will not hit the fan. I know it is not much but fuck it its my dream and fuck you its what they should have. I do not want anything but those who have stood at my side to have what they should for being there. Then again they can never say I didn’t leave them with some great stories to tell, but stick around I might even tell you some of those doozies.